The best seasonal treats at Disneyland’s California Adventure

Let me tell you right now, I did not succeed. Even on two separate visits to the park, my stomach (and, let’s be honest, my wallet) could not handle tasting everything. But I did try 16 — or, depending on how you count, 18 — and I’m here to give you my take on the best and worst of the bunch.

Before I started, I set up some parameters: I’d have something from every holiday the festival represents and rank them on a totally subjective scale of 1-10, skipping the cocktails in favor of things everyone can try. 

Impossible Arepa Encantada

First up, I tried the Impossible Arepa Encantada from the Grandma’s Recipes kiosk. Disney is doing much more interesting things with vegetarian and plant-based foods these days. This arepa is pretty good: the corn cake is stuffed with plant-based cheese and has a good flavor, and the Impossible “ground beef” on top is well-seasoned and topped with pickled onions. I ate the whole thing, even though I didn’t mean to. 

Rating: 7/10

Esquites Carnitas Mac & Cheese

Next up was the Esquites Carnitas Mac & Cheese from the Merry Mashups Marketplace. This is love at first bite. I love the white cheddar cheese sauce, and the carnitas on top is very flavorful. I do wish there was more spiced corn, but the spicy, crispy puffed rice garnish adds a whole other depth of flavor. I’m very excited about this, until I eat the first layer and discover some mealy clumps of plain pasta. 

Rating: 8/10

Peppermint Churro

My first day of trying festival foods is the first day of the festival, and let me tell you, lines are long. I grab a peppermint churro, topped with chocolate and vanilla sauces and crushed candy canes, on the way to the Grand Californian, where I intend to shake off the crowds with a glass of champagne. Under the Joey Tribbiani Principle that I invented when I tried that viral pickle corn dog earlier this year (take “Custard, good. Jam, good. Beef, good.” and substitute food variables as needed), this dessert is perfect for Christmas.

Rating:  7/10

Churro Toffee Cold Brew Latte

I head back for day two, which I start with the Churro Toffee Cold Brew Latte from the A Twist on Tradition everyone is obsessing over online. Check this intense description and you might see why: “Joffrey’s Coffee & Tea Company Mexico Origin-blend Coffee, Demerara and cinnamon sugar, vanilla bean and almond milk topped with whipped cream and churro toffee pieces.” It’s fine, I drink most of it, but it doesn’t hold a candle to space coffee. 

Rating: 6/10

Reuben Potato Bites and Reimagined Beef Brisket Wellington

At the same kiosk, I order Reuben Potato Bites with Russian Dressing & Rye Toast Crumble and Reimagined Beef Brisket Wellington. The corned beef on the Reuben tots is rubbery and the dressing is too sweet. I enjoy the Wellington a lot more — the gravy is savory, the beef is tender and the mushrooms are tasty — but the top half of my Mickey-shaped puff pastry is oddly missing. 

Rating for Potato Bites: 5/10
Rating for Brisket Wellington: 8/10

House-Made Pozole and Pineapple Tres Leches Roulade

I get that this is a holiday event, but while I’m making my way to Paradise Garden Grill in 90-degree sunshine for my next treat (hot soup! Why not?), I very much do not feel in the holiday spirit. I mostly feel sweaty. When I get to the restaurant, I see 30 people waiting in line. If the House-made Pozole weren’t one of my must-trys, I wouldn’t wait, but when I finally get to the front of the line I order the tasting portion of the soup that you can get with the Sip and Savor Pass (you get eight smaller portions for a discounted rate) and a piece of Pineapple Tres Leches Roulade. 

The soup — a red chile and pork stew — is delicious, but I wish it were a little spicier. 

The cake is maybe the saddest looking thing I’ve ever ordered at Disneyland, but tres leches is kind of gooey and unbeautiful no matter how you slice it. When I bite into the vanilla sponge cake rolled with pineapple fruit paste and cinnamon buttercream, I am pleasantly surprised. The tart pineapple and the cinnamon work well together, and the overall flavor is mostly true to tres leches cakes I’ve had before. 

Rating for Pozole: 7.5/10
Rating for Roulade: 8/10

Chana Masala with Garlic Naan

Feeling more than a little full, I head to the Favorite Things Marketplace for Chana Masala with Garlic Naan. I love Indian food, but this chickpea and vegetable stew is definitely made for people who aren’t familiar with the cuisine. They softballed the spices so much, even on the naan, that all I taste is stewed tomatoes. The upside? The Cast Member who served me the food asked to see my “shopping list” like she was a Christmas elf, and it was adorable. 

Rating: 5/10

Beef Pot Roast on a Potato Roll

The Beef Pot Roast on a Potato Roll from Winter Sliderland is delicious: flavorful, tender, exactly what I want it to be. I do wish the horseradish cream had more kick, but all in all, I enjoy it a lot. 

Rating: 8/10

Hot Cocoa Marshmallow Macaron

I stop for a sweet interlude at the Making Spirits Bright Marketplace for a Hot Cocoa Marshmallow Macaron, which is so good. The velvety filling tastes exactly like hot cocoa in solid form. I want to eat it all, but I can’t, but I want to. 

Rating: 9/10

Impossible Chorizo Queso Fundido

You guys, I have to be honest, I am very full, and I still have at least four foods on my must-try list “for journalism.” I sit down at Mendocino Terrace with a glass of white wine to take a rest and digest, staring half-longingly and half in terror at the Impossible Chorizo Queso Fundido with house-made tortilla chips from the Brews & Bites Marketplace. When I finally do, I’m really impressed. Someone who didn’t know they were eating plant-based cheese and meat would never know — but they would want some water, because woo is it spicy. 

Rating: 8.5/10

Braised Pork Belly Adobo with Garlic Fried Rice

At Holiday Duets, I order Braised Pork Belly Adobo with Garlic Fried Rice. I’m not sure this is for everyone, because it has a salty, garlicky flavor with a capital “F,” but I love this. The pork belly is fork tender and much better prepared than I’d expect at a festival kiosk. 

Rating: 9/10

Loaded Latke and Holiday Shake

My last destination is Smokejumpers Grill, for the thing I’ve been looking forward to most all day: the Loaded Latke. But when I get there, I see a line of 15 people out the door waiting to order. My heart can’t take it. Luckily, this place offers mobile ordering, and there’s an arrival window in 10 minutes. I order my items and by the time I get back I can select “prepare my order” on the app. It’s ready for pickup in three minutes. When the system works, it really works. 

I love this latke so much. It’s covered in smoked beef brisket and a plant-based horseradish sauce, garnished with scallions. Every element is perfect. I’m in pain at this point but I eat this gleefully. 

I also order a Holiday Shake, which is described as “spiced shake garnished with green whipped cream and a red wreath donut.” Whoever wrote this description was, to paraphrase Buddy the Elf, sitting on a throne of lies. When I heard “spiced shake,” I assumed holiday spices like cinnamon, nutmeg, maybe some allspice. Only when I realize my mouth is burning after every sip do I realize it’s an actual, literal spicy milkshake, and by spice they just mean pain, like Red Hots but with none of the flavor and all of the zing. I take one bite of the donut, also covered in painful “spice,” and the corners of my mouth burn for, I kid you not, a solid 15 minutes. I’m not sure who Disney’s target demographic is for this shake, but I am not it.

Rating for Latke: 10/10
Rating for Shake: 2/10

As for the extra two I mentioned earlier? They’re the Nashville Hot Turkey Slider from Winter Sliderland and the Stuffing Mac & Cheese from Favorite Things Marketplace, which I’ve tried at previous Festivals of the Holidays. I didn’t like either one enough to order it again, especially the turkey, which I remember as being too tough to bite through. 

Nashville Hot Turkey Slider Rating: 2/10
Stuffing Mac & Cheese Rating: 4/10

You definitely don’t have to take my advice on what to order (and what to avoid), but take my advice when I say that you should definitely make a hit list before you get to the park if trying different festival foods are important to you. The lines get long and you’ll get tired and impatient fast, which is what happened to me on my first visit. The second time, I could pick and choose where I went depending on line length, while my list kept me on-track and happily (and sometimes unhappily) fed. 

Another pro tip: bring some plastic baggies for your leftovers if you’re going to try a lot in one day. I ate the rest of the pot roast and latke as a snack when I got home, and I was very happy about my life choices.